By Adam Eisenson*
Christmas comes but once a year. And it’s the happiest time of year
… for retailers. That’s why new gift-giving holidays are being created
all the time. Sure, there are the old standbys like birthdays, weddings,
anniversaries, baby showers, and … that gem of holidays … Valentine’s
We’re expected to buy for Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Grandmother’s
Day, Secretary’s Day, and Boss’s Day. I’ll bet that during Pet’s Week,
many a “lucky” Fido gets a rhinestone studded chain, a ceramic
bone with his name engraved on it, or some other stupid, unnecessary
trinket to help fill up a closet in his colonial styled doghouse.
Kmart, Sears, and Wal-Mart aside, for many of us, the holiday spirit
gets lost in a frantic search for gifts … and by the need to borrow
at high credit card interest to pay for them. At last count, Americans
had almost $400 billion revolving on their plastic. The sad truth
is that once we whip out our charge cards, many of us fall prey to
impulse buying … and spend substantially more than we had planned.
Haunted by Hallmark
There truly are “cards for every occasion.” This year, we
received our first Happy Thanksgiving card. Whatever happened to that
old-fashioned hand-written note saying, “Hope you feel better
soon,” or “I’m thinking of you”?
Does true love (even moderate friendship) need an influx of corny
sayings to survive? I don’t believe so. Does going broke prove love,
appreciation, deep religious belief, or friendship? Hardly! All it
proves is poor judgment and a lack of self-control.
If you want to voluntarily simplify your life, over-commercialized,
make-believe holidays are a great place to start. It seems to me that
cutting down on the 7.4 billion greeting cards Americans send a year
is the perfect place to begin getting back to basics.
We spent $6.3 billion in 1995 on greeting cards, alone. That’s
a lot of dimes for schmaltzy rhymes. So from now on, skip it on
Snoopy, zap Ziggy, and get away from Garfield. Write a personal note
instead. It’s easy.
At the risk of being seen as the Scrooge of the 20th Century, here
are more ideas for simplifying life’s special events and avoiding
“love token” poverty, all year long:
. Now is the time to talk to every-one you
exchange gifts with, and change the rules. Stop it altogether, or
agree to set a lower limit, or to only exchange homemade goodies.
At a minimum, agree not to trade meaningless junk.
- Start some inexpensive traditions
: A group-cooked meal, a
trip to your favorite museum or park … perhaps something that really
celebrates what the holiday is supposed to commemorate (like a birthday
visit to the town where you were born).
With families getting so complicated these days, more and more of
us are conflicted about where to have holiday meals. Do we join this
side of the family, or that … or that? Years ago, Nancy, my children,
and I began to celebrate Thanksgiving on virtually any day but the
fourth Thursday of November. It’s become so much fun, that we try
to have numerous Thanksgiving dinners throughout the year.
Think of all the benefits to celebrating the holidays a month earlier
or a month later: While you prove your independence and sanity, you’ll
also avoid the hype, the crowds, the costs, the hassles.
- Give up garbage collecting
. Avoid adding to closet clutter.
Stop buying gifts that never have and never will make anyone happy,
just to “give something.” Suggest that your family and friends
pool resources. Buy the bride, birthday boy, or long married couple
a really significant present. And remember, “significant”
doesn’t have to be expensive.
- Give gifts that actually mean something.
It’s really wonderful
to receive a practical or truly personal gift. Six years ago, Harry
Lazare, who used to work here, got tired of us all struggling with
an old, persnickety, hand-crank can opener. He gave Nancy and me a
sturdier, reliable (also non-electric) model. Hardly expensive, it
was so thoughtful and so needed … that we were delighted. We chuckle
and think of Harry every time we take it out of the drawer.
. The possibilities are endless: But you
can’t go wrong thinking food … fruitcake aside. Give those new
parents or someone recuperating from surgery or chemo a home-cooked
meal. They won’t forget it.
If they aren’t already in your repertoire, how about learning to make
soups, breads, cookies, jams, or herb vinegars? Then put together
a gift basket of goodies. Like everything else, if you do-it-yourself,
you can save money and really personalize the assortment. If you want
to practice, feel free to send those yummy samples to me.
Nancy’s always giving away flowers that she grows, indoors or out,
depending on the season. And believe it or not, I just sent my daughter,
Sharon, some home grown brussels sprouts (which she and we love).
Can you knit, do needlepoint, make wooden toys, or compile some of
your favorite recipes? Did I mention that the possibilities are endless?
When you care enough to give the very best
Donate some of your time to a homeless kitchen
or other worthwhile organization. And don’t limit your generosity
to Christmas or Thanksgiving … the homeless are cold and hungry
on other days as well.
Or offer to babysit for a niece, nephew, the neighbor’s child, or
your grandkid. Let their frazzled parents take a kid-free mini-vacation,
even if it’s only a peaceful night’s sleep!
Or you could share a skill. If you’re a master gardener, help a friend
develop a green thumb. Can you strum a guitar, make a bench, reupholster
a couch, or do magic? I’d rather learn a skill than get a hideous
tie. Wouldn’t you?
. All year long, keep your eyes out at
church rummage sales, garage sales, auctions, and consignment shops
for gift ideas. Recycled toys that you’ve cleaned up are great for
Sarah, the bundle-of-energy daughter of our researcher, Marcy Ross,
received an instant family heirloom from a doting aunt and uncle,
who stripped and repainted an old children’s rocking chair they found
at a tag sale.
Nancy keeps her eyes out for cashmere sweaters to give to our favorite
sweater hounds … as well as hounds, in the shape of hokey bulb
planters, for our two favorite dog lovers, Janet and Rachel. (She
fills those planters every year with tulips, crocuses, and daffodils,
for a touch of spring in the dead of winter.)
- Have a very, merry unbirthday
! When you see something that
you know will be useful, affordable, and appreciated, why not declare
your own holiday? There were some very wide smiles on my children’s
faces the day I unexpectedly drove up with a very much used bicycle
built for two strapped to my car’s trunk.
- Resolve to give gifts that help earn or save money
. For example,
a gift certificate for a continuing education course, or toward a
tune-up for the family car. How about a cash gift earmarked as a pre-payment
on a mortgage, car loan, or credit card bill … along with a copy
of The Banker’s Secret?
Entering college students can use rolls of quarters (for laundry),
as well as stamps and phone cards. Our nephew Ben went off to Brown
with an old bowling bag that Nancy and I had outfitted with everything
from an assortment of screws and a “hot pot” to a pair of
electrician’s pliers that I had used … and loved … for years.
- The notion that we deserve instant gratification
for our various governments, and 70% of Americans having no money
left after paying the most basic of expenses. If you must buy …
plan! Look for sales … and ask retailers when they’ll happen. Certain
things do traditionally go on sale at specific times, every year.
For example, January is “white sale month,” when great buys
can be had on sheets and towels. Remember, it’s always sale time at
Preparing for battle
? If you routinely end up paying off
Christmas well into the New Year, ditch your credit cards and begin
paying with a debit card. Or better still, use cash and traveler’s
If you do use a debit card or check, make sure you’re not about to
borrow from your overdraft “protection.” Learn from Uncle
Sam. Even when you have the money, or the credit, if you don’t control
your spending … your debt will continue to climb and climb … until
you need to curtail “all non-essential” purchases.
- When retailers loudly trumpet, “No payments for 6 months,”
or “Buy now … pay later,” be careful! They’re not going
to give it to you for nothing. They’ve already built a healthy cushion
into the purchase price. And more often than not, you’ll get hit with
hefty interest charges, anyway. Those ads should say, “Buy now
… go broke later.”
When Visa or MasterCard invites you to
skip paying a bill one month, “because you always pay your bill
on time,” just say “No!” Otherwise, you’re just going
to end up paying extra big bucks in interest.
- Don’t blindly believe “guaranteed lowest prices.”
Merchants count on the fact that once you buy, you’re not likely to
price shop. And if you price shop, you’re not likely to haul yourself
back to the store for a small refund. If you do haul yourself back,
you won’t have proper “proof.” Even if you have proof, you’ll
be one in a million, and the shopkeepers will happily return your
over-payment … because they’ll be keeping everyone else’s.
- Replace voluntary stupidity with voluntary simplicity.
it’s a gift for someone else … or a reward for yourself, be smart.
If you haven’t done so already, I hope that this will be the year
you’ll start to cultivate a simple attitude. Getting back to basics
may help to keep you solvent … and living better on less is really
a lot of fun. Try it. You’ll like it!
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